Wednesday, November 18, 2009

How to Eat Cunt

How to Eat Cunt
By Berneard Depareadeaut
Translation by Cody Clarke

Eating cunt is a science-- biology, mostly. Let us discuss.

The cunt is a labia.
All of woman is labia. To approach a woman in such a way is ideal. What are the properties of labia? Sorbet. Women are always cold. If you warm them with your tongue they will be most comfortable. If you warm them too much they will be too liquid for cunt eating.

Cunt hair as power source.
Cunt hair are cilia for women using swimming. Like an amoeba. To disrupt this is unwiser of man. Leave hair alone. If remove: hide evidence so as not to disrupt feeling pleasures.

Rhythmic Pulsations.
A vaginae has a rhythm much like a basketball. To not dribble is to cheat. Dribble cunt juices on the vaginae for maximum pleasure comfort. Support fair-trade cunt juices at your local grocer.

The Orgasm Orgasm.
When the orgasm orgasms, you will know by a tone. F#. Tune surrounding instruments accordingly to heighten vibration of cum. Shake the penis with vibrations in the air at it. It will turn into cum. The woman will be proud of her venerability.

Bastion.
An old joke of my grandfather:

Baker: Bastion, where are you?
Bastion: I am making cum.
Baker: Be quick of it.
Bastion: I am actually Bastionenne!

Afterward.
I appreciate your reading of. Thanks to you, your woman will think at you. Cum is shot. The penis.

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