Sunday, May 31, 2009

Sex Poem

Sex puts a dick in your ass
or a dick in your pussy.

This is a wondrous part of sex.

The groans and the moans
as your pussy hairs wave
to an incoming cock.

The orgasm of your orgasm.

Pussy fluid lubricating anything it touches.

Where can cocks be found,
if not in a pussy?
Waiting to be in a pussy.

I want to sniff cocks out,
like a pig to a truffle.
The Lord has made me this way.

Oh, my pussy gets so hot in temperature,
when you are near.

When you are far, my pussy drops to a temperature
as cold as ice, and I await your return.

You are the man for me, for sure.

Take my ass in your hands and lead me to a bed
so that you may impregnate my asshole with your seed.

I want to have a baby out of my asshole because of you.

Cum in my eyes so that I give birth to babies out of my eyes.
My holes are for having your babies.

I love you.

Friday, May 29, 2009

Evolutionary Sex

As everyone knows, Evolution gave us sex and it thus commands us to have as much sex as we can. This is a moral imperative. All life is holy to Evolution but it desires the Perfect Being and we must have the most sex to make this Holy Ghost real. This event will be called the Second Coming of Evolution. The First Coming, of course, refers to the beginning of life as Evolution's primordial semen.

I think the most important evolution in the history of it was the evolution of the Variable Length Penis (known in Europe as the Telescoping Prick). Before this evolution all the animals had to either walk around with a rock hard animal dick all day or remain limp and flaccid. This was a choice every animal made at birth. The evolution was made when a hard dick animal fucked a flaccid dick animal and they had a baby animal who was sometimes hard and sometimes flaccid.

If I may be allowed to hypothesize (no, I am not going to wait for your permission), I would like to give you my opinion about the next major evolution we will be given by Evolution. It is Interchangeable Genitals.

Evolution Bless You All!

Thursday, May 28, 2009

Small Penises

I am a hot, hot woman and I have big tits. 36-24-26 is my proportions. I'm toned and lovely. Beautiful face. So trust my opinion: Small penises are the greatest for fucking.

It's true. I love a small, puny penis on an overweight man. It is the best for fucking. It feels so nice in my tight pussy hairs. I like men who know how to sweat all day long. I especially like it when they sit in a chair in an air conditioned room watching Sliders on DVD. It is so hot that it makes me want to fuck myself with a small 2" limp dildo.

I like it when a man's glasses are so thick you could throw them off the empire state building and they wouldn't break. I like it when a man rubs tiny Risk infantry on my clitoral hood. It feels so nice on my clitoral hood for this to happen.

Have you ever eaten a perfect asshole? Mine is the perfect asshole. I only allow men with halitosis to eat it. Halitosis feels so nice on my anal nerve endings. Oh, how wonderful it is.

I am getting so wet writing all of this that I'm sliding off my chair. It's fucking unsafe for me to be writing this anymore, because I don't want to slip and fall and die.

Ciao for now,
Marissa the Minxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx XO

Tuesday, May 26, 2009

Cumshot Highway

There is a highway in America known as the Cumshot Highway. Those that know its location keep it a secret. You cannot find it by word of mouth. Only by stumbling upon it.

On the Cumshot Highway there are naked ladies hiding in the woods that will let you fuck them in any way imaginable and then cum on their faces. This is the truth. They are the hottest naked ladies you're ever seen. Titties perfect like God's made them before he made everything else in the world. Fresh with His ingenuity. His passion for creation.

Their vaginas are brazilian waxed and awesome as fuck. Inside, they feel so warm and tight that you'd swear your dick was in Satan's asshole. No man has been able to last more than three seconds inside, but it is the best three seconds of your life.

After you pull out, they present their gorgeous faces towards your cock and you can shoot your cock cum all over their faces. It's a worthwhile experience.

Nobody knows why they're there. Perhaps its because they love cum. Some say they were born there. Some say they're a mirage. Whatever it is, it sure is great that they exist.

Life rules. Hit that shit up. Drive around. Find this place. Hit it up. Get it on.

~~~o Sperm for life ~~~o ~~~o ~~~o ~~~o ~~~o ~~~o ~~~o ~~~o

Monday, May 25, 2009

The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Cunt

Arthur was standing in his bathroom brushing his teeth and thinking of cunt when he noticed a giant cunt outside his window. 'Cunt', he thought to himself, and continued brushing his teeth.

Later on, while stroking his penis as he took a shit, he noticed the cunt outside the window again. 'Cunt', he thought to himself, and then continued stroking his penis as he took a shit.

Still later, he was eating toast for breakfast when he finally saw the cunt in all its glory through the front windows of his house. There were three giant cunts in fact, all facing his house. This was not acceptable.

Arthur ran out of his house and screamed 'Cunt!' at the cunts. The cunts queefed in his direction. He continued screaming 'cunt!' and the cunts continued queefing back at him. Nothing of value was being communicated, ao Arthur left and went to the pub. He would have went to the bar, but he's british.

At the pub, he sat down next to a black man. The black man had a giant cock that was so large it looked like he had his son sitting on his lap. Arthur fucked the black man in the bathroom 42 times and then they went to outer space.

The End

Sunday, May 24, 2009

Gav Is Waiting

She was the most beautiful woman any of us had ever seen. Her name was America. She had her hair flowing, blond hair like a flag, and she had a squid. My friends and I would build forts outside her windows in the summer to stroke each others' boy penis, all watching through the window like it was a pornographic tape player, with her undressing and shoving beacons into her flipping girl tube. My friends were all young boys with cocks that we had our hands on the other boy's one.

Eventually America's parent discovered our Hide-And-Sex Fort and spent all summer grumbling around the yard for something to do, while boy semen dripped through the floor of the fort and fertilized Summer Competitiveness in the grass below. America never stopped becoming having no clothes on with her hand in her fish-port, it lasted all summer in the good old days. On the 4th of July our young shafts were turned into different colors by the juicy, sex-thinking fireworks exploding into orgasmic obsessed little boy dicks above. Our semen shot into the air above the fort and stayed there, and formed a swirling, flickery ball of multi-colored dazzling display of young one's cum-ball.

America's only parent with no gender shot at the Firework Ball of Kid Spank with his Intimidating Parent Gun, attempting to scare my masturbating friends and I away with loud noises and threats of expulsion. By this time though, this was nearing fall time, we were too determined to achieve Sex With Woman. As the leaves changed colors from ripe and sexy to old and withered-vagina, our mutual hand jobbing picked up its paced; we would need the semen reserves for the winter. The wind howled sometimes in the fall, and on one notably blustery day, the Dazzling Ball of Boy Matter was wrapped in leaves like a present for America.

When winter came, we congratulated the Happy Kid responsible for the idea of reserving our semen, as he surely saved us from the cold. His design for the Frozen Boy Cum Fort Top, coupled with our sweaty, collective Boy Jerking, kept us warm and satisfied through the long, waiting winter. The only unfortunate feature of the igloo being its necessary being-closed-in; we could not see America.

As the spring thaw came, I knew our friendships-for-life were cemented like the semen castle we had erected - like boy penis - around and above us. More than the warming of the surrounding air we were uplifted - and so were our young boy cocks - by the fresh site of America with her New Hair and New Dripping Gav. Our cocks with their still-pumping Friendly Hands were given new life. As well, the winter had coated our leafy, dazzling Ball of Boy Wonder, turning it into a depressing, shocking display of Young Boy Sex. America's single, breastless parent cried alone beneath our ball and drove his bloodied fists into the earth.

As summer neared, and as the ball was blanketed yet again - this time with the falling, flying petals of Amazing Flowers - we heard with a Wrench-from-a-Heart that America would be leaving soon for a new home, where she would study at university in the arts of "Pleasing In Her Man's Hidden Gav". The friendly boy-jerking stopped, the Ball of Dazzled Glorious Young Boy's Hard Earned Annual Thick Sleaze fell to the ground, crushing America's sad single parent. We tore the fort down, and all became very unsuccessful people.

Word Sex

The couple was deeply in the mood for sex. Usually, they had other people involved, sometimes other couples. As the group would deeply pile, more sex was thought of than actually realized. It was an odd predicament to be surrounded by so much sex that sex became a distant reality. However, for these couples, it became part of daily life.

For the single couple, they would indulge in pleasures that they would never forget. The man was tender; he had large thick muscles, but the only thing he would crush on his woman was her lack of orgasm. The woman was beautiful and full of depth; she had a beautiful mind and body, a face that the man could watch and breathe into. She was like a cloud to him and he drifted into her sky. Sometimes he saw beyond it; these things he saw would never forgive him and he could never forget.

Foreplay, although somewhat forgotten, was not an act of weakness. Each of the two would begin with simple words; these words would fire up the imagination just as genitals were inflamed. He cursed on occasion to wet her hair. She was like a high school principal; she would invite him to his office and fuck. He dreamed of students piled up on her desk, rubbing chocolate over their bodies. As a principal, she was gentle and had candy in her office for her students. They would not fuck her in the office; instead they fucked each other as she imagined them fucking her and fucked herself. The small words the couple used allowed for fantasies such as these to flourish. Simple words could make the man's erection throb deeply. The woman's parts had similar responses to simple words during the earliest sex.

When they proceeded to the actual sex, the words lengthened as the man's penis did. His woman's vagina would expand and spread itself into a world of pleasure. As they touched it, they mumbled words of great length and difficulty. The woman heard a word that made her ears perk up; she could definitely tell that the man had done his sexual dictionary practice. He often masturbated while expanding his vocabulary; the words entered his mind as the sperms left his body. The sperms would rebuild while his vocabulary remained reinforced. He had discovered a way for infinite expansion of his erotic potential. The two would climb on top of each other and the man would penetrate the woman. During the actual penetration, the man had words that he always utilized that would cause great wetness in his woman.

He would thrust and she would receive his cock. She would feel all of the ridges of his cock as it slid in and out of her well-oiled part. They would kiss as she felt pleasure. The act would need to reach a peak, however. These were experienced wordsmiths; they had heard nearly every word that had ever existed. Sex had occurred so many times that words had been assigned to nearly every emotion experienced during the sex act. This could become boring for the couple, so as they reached their climax, they would resort to gibberish and strange syllables. He would fuck so hard as strange words dripped from his mouth onto her willing mind. She would scream macabre sounds of nonsense as he sunk his teeth into her gentle flesh. He would grip her breasts with more sounds as she listened so intensely. She heard every sound of his and he heard every sound in the room. He needed to experience the room as much as he needed to experience her climax.

The gibberish would become so rich that recording it provided impossible. The man had tried to film their act numerous times and failed. The word-sounds were distorted and overwhelmed by the pleasure. Occasionally the man could recall a syllable that would cause instantaneous orgasm, even while casually traversing the halls of his workplace. He tried so hard to save these sounds for bathroom breaks or during his lonely time at home while he waited for his woman to re-arrive.

He would clench her as they both reached orgasm at the exact same moment. They had trained their bodies to arrive simultaneously, like two sex-cars at a sex-intersection. Instead of a crash, this collision would resemble a fluid transfer, with pleasure as its vessel. At the exact moment of climax, the gibberish would remain on a single syllable until the orgasm-experience would begin to fade. The climax of their word sex resembled a rebel yell, exclusively with the objective of fuck-synergy.

As the couple lay in bed, surrounded by the blankets of children, they would descend from their sexual heaven so slowly and gently. Light gibberish would occur, promptly followed by the words of kings and finalized with the words of peasants.

Saturday, May 23, 2009

Alex Hiatt

Alex Hiatt has a big red cock with no visible veins, just smooth redness. It looks like a crayola crayon with the paper peeled off, though much larger; at least as long as an automobile, but as thin as a pencil.

When not writing comedy for Hollywood, Alex stands outside of girls' locker rooms and slides his penis under the door and watches girls shower with the eye that is located on the glans of his penis. He has two cats and lives on a Bird Watchers' Commune in Ann Arbor, MI.

Friday, May 22, 2009

Sex has a Color, Alex

A painter was working all the day long in his workshop. He lived on an island (of variable size) near the Equator. He thought this would help him balance things. He thought it would help him balance the right and left hemispheres of his brain (the right side had always been subtly heavier and sometimes he would drift in that direction if he was running really fast) and to balance things on his head on the way home from the market and to balance his work and fuck. His wife was a hat designer. She tried to help him with running by designing him a hat that was heavier on the left side than on the right. The hat looked like this:
Or like this:

And came in a pink hat box like this:

The painter was now able to run in a straight line. He thanked his wife for the considerate gift and they enjoyed a delicious island dinner and some island sex.

But this had happened a long time ago. It happened when they were happy and the painter was successful. Now they were poor and ate frail, impoverished rats.

"I have to find The Most Beautiful Color," was the pervading thought the painter had, "to save my wife and ensure she will continue designing hats for people with inefficiently headshapes."

And so it was that the painter spent the entire winter of the Equator (a delicious time to be outside) in his workshop mixing paints. He mixed every color that was possible except for the one he was looking for. Then one day his wife stopped him and said "Painter, it is time for us to fulfill our Sex Need." And they had some more of their familiar island sex. When the painter's Michelangelo had finished painting the roof of his wife's Sistine Vagina in Biblical images, he fell into a deep and fast sleep. He dreamed of Sex.

When the painter awoke, he went back into his workshop and made the last color. While he was mixing it he felt a subtle feeling, as though he had been swimming deep underwater and had swam into a Vaginafish. When the color was finished he knew it was the color he had seen in his dream. He knew it was Sex.

He called his wife. "Wife!" She came and saw the color. Then they sold the color to someone who payed them a lot of money for it and they retired to a new island (which they had constructed on top of the old one) and ate plump, aristocratic rats.

The color experienced a number of adventures over the next few centuries but eventually came to rest in the Soviet Union Paint University's Chromatic Library. The color is notable for one thing more than anything else: in regards to it, objective and subjective qualities are reversed. Thus, the color has an exact, measurable and quantifiable emotional effect on any optical device that perceives it (living or otherwise), but the wavelengths of light it reflects and absorbs are unique to everyone who takes that measurement. The emotional effect Sex produces is somewhere between nostalgia, envy, and wispiness. It was blue to me.

Monday, May 18, 2009

A Cumshot for all Seasons

She had a rack like two big breasts in a shirt. I loved this woman. We'd been married for years, and it was a good marriage. I'd fucked her every day we'd been married at 6PM. It was 'our way'. It was nice.

One day, I cam home early from work. She was fucking a black mexican in the foyer. This was unacceptable to me, because we were married. My wife and I, not the black mexican and I.

I shouted out loud at my wife and then I shouted out loud at the black mexican. They both got really scared at the sound of my shout, but not scared enough to stop fucking.

So I had to take matters into my own hands.

I pulled my limp penis out and masturbated. My penis wasn't even hard, but it didn't need to be. This was not for pleasure. This was for being heard.

I closed my eyes and thought of all sorts of women that looked really hot to me. Again, this was not for pleasure. This was just to get the cum out.

And when the cum came out, it was the cum I'd wanted to come out. A mighty cum.

It shot all over the entire foyer and drowned my wife and the black mexican. Knowing what was coming, I was quick enough to swim to the ceiling and not drown.

Afterward, I cleaned it all up with tissues and threw the cummy tissues, black mexican, and wife out in the toilet. Life was good again.

It was truly a cumshot for all seasons.

Ass

This smut is just about a big, beautiful ass.

The kind of ass you want to unveil with one of those metal round shiny things that fancy people have their food kept underneath before they are going to eat it so that it stays warm while they are off washing their hands or taking a pee or whatever they're doing right before they are going to eat their food at their dinning table in the night-time.

This is the ass that the woman on the bus had. Each cheek of it was more perfect than the other. It was a shiny ass, because it was a hot day, and she was sweaty on her ass. She had no pants or panties on, and got away with it, because of how nice her ass was. Her legs and ass were so perfect it looked like she was wearing them. Nobody could believe it was actual flesh in front of them, but I knew what was up. I got right behind her and I fucked that ass until everyone on the bus knew the truth: that I was fucking a bare-assed woman on the bus.

Sunday, May 17, 2009

Vial of Sex

The couple was working in their laboratory. Everything had been very calm thus far; they had finished a lot of work and were proud of their progress on their experiments. As they recorded data in the thick, brown book, they looked forward to the upcoming research that they would perform. The lab looked very stereotypical; all along the tables were glass jars and bubbling mixtures. The couple were looking to solve some immense scientific problems and would have to look deep within each other to do so.

Because this was work, the couple left their sex drive at home. These were not tables for a science-fuck. Work would occur there, but all scientists knew that two pulsing bodies could send weeks worth of research into oblivion.

The man knew of an incident that occurred to a colleague of his; this man had finished a tremendous project and had solved a major mystery of science. As he prepared to finalize his research, he became tempted by a co-worker's breasts. Her shirt had punctured as she was also finishing research. As her breasts erupted, the man's cock was already near her pussy. The juices created a science hazard site on the floor; the two would slip as they slipped into each other. As they fucked and came together, the research became obscured by clouds of smoky liquid left unattended. Puddles of vaginal fluid and smoky liquid caused scientific collapse. The orgasms were good, but years of lost research overcame their pleasures. Both were fired from science and were forced to join the army to kill others.

Close calls always happened at science-work. Sometimes the woman would spot a cock and rub her clit. The man would get his cock trapped in a cupboard and fuck it open. For science though, they had to keep themselves under control. No one in science ever said that fuck could not occur around science. It is just the lost research and dissolving of scientific mystery solutions that cause the science committee to limit fuck to the non-laboratory. These were extraordinary individuals, undertaking tasks that would cause ordinary men of non-science to weaken and simply-fuck.

The couple were working with a complex micro-protein as they tried to solve a mystery of science. The man, precise and careful, did the pouring of one test tube to the other. His cock would not prevent science today. His female companion would grab the correct liquid compounds and generally list down the daily progress in the thick brown book that was shared by everyone in science. They sometimes would share a wet kiss when some miracle of science occurred. The licking and kissing would not always cause a fuck. They were aware of this and through complex probability calculations, decided that kissing could be acceptable on the job.

Chemicals were placed in the proper slots on the science-tables. They were all clearly labeled with dark blue ink on thick card stock. The man requested a very specific compound. His companion sought out to grab it. She moved carefully and efficiently. As she grasped the compound, her science gloves protected her from any contamination. She brought it back to the man. This woman never made mistakes. Today would be the greatest mistake for her, however.

The science-man had requested a compound called "Lex," a compound of neutrons and particles and other complex objects. However, the woman had grabbed the "Sex" vial, carrying it back to her man. He never checked the label; science men relied on the efforts of science women to look at labels. As the man poured the compound - what he thought was "Lex" - into the mixture, science found itself undone. Thick, smoky compound fluid filled the room and the lungs of the couple. "Sex" overtook them; he lifted the woman onto the table and tore her lab-pants from her pulsing clit and labia. Her mons pubis was swirling and her tongue was reaching for a companion-mouth. Each thrust would undo science. His cock was racing for an ejaculation, something her thick, twisted twat was already craving, despite sex-intoxication only mere seconds before. He fucked so hard. She fucked so hard. They fucked so hard.

Science, a fragile art of meticulous note-keeping and examination, found itself toppled by realized sex-thoughts. Every time the woman's breasts jiggled, a number went missing or an entry vanished in the thick brown book. Thoughts of science disappeared as fuck-thoughts washed the mind. The man hoisted his companion into the air as he fucked her deeper and deeper. Test tubes shattered as the smoky liquid cleared from the room. As the man ejaculated, the woman moaned in deep ecstasy. Not surprisingly, a rare science note from a visiting scientist dissolved as small droplets of cum multiplied through the air and collected upon it, aided by the "Sex" fluid's property of unaided duplication.

Despite the devastating actions of the couple, the science committee would not find them guilty of research destruction. The student who had been responsible for closing up the lab the previous night was supposed to take the experimental "Sex" vial into a neutral zone. He had not done his job and was fired from science. As a student, he would never be allowed to practice science again. The couple, devastated by research-loss caused directly by their actions, still remained in ecstasy for a long while after the event. Sex while doing science was more potent than normal sex (mostly due to the chemical enhancements of science) and limiting it caused withdrawal symptoms not unlike those of drug-addicts. It was for this reason that laboratory-fuck was forever banned from science.

Saturday, May 16, 2009

Victor Clumb and the Tooth'd Vagina, Part 2

If I tell you about I friend I have named Victor Clumb, you will probably think he is a person. He isn't this. Victor Clumb is an alien with a penis/an alien penis/an alien and a penis separately/an penis adventures. I made Victor Clumb up because he has done things I have not done. Perhaps I am envious of his. He adventures. But that isn't how he makes his living; he earns money selling treasure he finds in vaginas. The best place to look for treasure in a vagina is in the treasure room. It is just behind the Skene's Gland. He sells his treasures to an Icelandic Treasure Breaker (broker is the past tense, correct?).

Victor Clumb's Bosses send him to conquer the Tooth'd Vagina and rescue Esther Ether. Victor Clumb has Bosses because they are nice to him and they help him find treasure. He doesn't have to listen to them, because he is more powerful and adventursome than they are, but he never doesn't listen to them because they have a close Friendship Bond.

Victor Clumb climbs into his flight craft and flies to the last known location of the Sighting of the Tooth'd Vagina. It isn't there anymore, but it has left a resideau, and Victor Clumb is All Things if he knows how to follow a resideau. He follows the resideau to the place it leads to, and formulates his plan to conquer the Tooth'd Vagina.

He must find a way to prevent the sharp Teeth from puncturing his soft penis skin. Especially his fourskin. It is from this that Victor Clumb takes its strength. Victor Clumb goes to a blacksmith and purchases a specially-fitted penis sheath. It is made of metal. It may also have some spikes; no one really remembers.

Victor Clumb inserts his Adventure Penis into the Tooth'd Vagina's dungeonmouth. He kills some skeletons, zombies, and vampires, and finds Esther Ether. Unfortunately, she is also a vampire and tries to kill Victor Clumb's Penis and drink it's (sic) blood. But Victor Clumb is a crafty and defeats her. He loots her corpse and finds a ring he can take back to his Bosses as proof of his victory. He then sets several permacrete detonators along the cervix and pulls out just in time. They both orgasm, spilling semens and vaginal cunt's juice.

An anthill is flooded and an epic poem is written about it.

Victor Clumb and The Tooth'd Vagina, Part 1

The Tooth'd Vagina appeared at 12:37 PM in the alley behind Hector's Mannish Meats. There it claimed its first known victims:

Indentobimous Bog, a famous person. Known for making frequent and unannounced month-long journeys into Hector's Meat Dungeons; he was not missed for some time.
Esther Ether, a cloud of steam rising from a subway vent. A prominent member of the Sub-City Council, her aides and harem began searching for her immediately, fearing the worst.
Powq Sat, 12 Kg of concentrated starlight. No one in this story can see; thus, no one ever even realized Powq existed.

By 9:47 PM, the Tooth'd Vagina had been sighted performing a starring role in a major opera. Its performance was praised by Everyone. (All of whom were later eaten by the Tooth'd Vagina.)

At 7:30 AM the next morning, the Tooth'd Vagina existed in another place. It was the Zoo.

Esther Ether's harem encounters the Tooth'd Vagina in a Tight Place sometime between 10 AM and 4:58 PM. They insert their penises, but find the Tooth'd Vagina to be a formidable foe. No one is injured but the harem becomes despondent at their loss and soon disperses. Some of it finds its way to the North and condenses on Victor Clumb's Bosses' glass of frozen human blood.

Sometime during their Midnight Meeting, Victor Clumb's Bosses touch one of their hands to their glass and absorb the condensed ex-harem members.

By 10 AM the next morning, the formerly condensed ex-harem members have merged their consciousness with that of Victor Clumb's Bosses, and they learn a number of things about the extraction processes of various heavy metals. They also become very concerned about the disappearance of Esther Ether.

To Be Written More of Later. . .

Wednesday, May 13, 2009

Origasmi

The couple had enjoyed a night on the town. What was pleasant for the wife became a furious tension in the man. She had worn an elegant, diaphanous dress that highlighted her curves very well. The man had traced her curves with his cock so many times before. He could not do it in public, however, so his tracing was restricted to light movement of his erection as he imagine-fucked.

When the couple arrived home, the man felt his sexual hunger arise. His pulsing penis became a culinary tool as they prepared for a sex-feast. Her curves were ample enough that he could have fucked her clothed. He needed raw, however; the man required a raw, sexual meal. As she became naked, the man prepared his tools. Her clitoris would be his main target as it generally was.

He prepared the roll, working diligently to assemble it, flattening the rice and seaweed, only to fold it back up again. As it became tubular, the woman's tits swelled and began to shriek. The man's erection was almost coming out of his skin. He would require to fuck.

Her clit swelled with a furious lingering. He gently placed the roll around it and with the utmost care, removed any excess roll. He had created a perfect fit; any excess roll could be used on her nipples later. The roll was wrapped tightly around her clit and he began to massage the roll, being careful not to bite through it causing clit-sever.

The man slid his cucumber into the roll, along with a spicy crab mixture. As his wife moaned, the man made the deal sweeter and sweeter. His pulsing glands and oozing eyes glared into the very soul of his woman. His cock was spinning out of control. Sweat poured from his face and he actively struggled to contain his testicles. He resisted until he could resist no longer; he devoured the roll, clitoris and all. His cum shot all over his wife's breasts as the meal occurred.

His wife, although devoured, felt extremely satisfied. She had become his meal in exchange for cum. She though fondly of other parts she could give up as well. The man smoked marijuana.

Friday, May 1, 2009

Legend of the Cock Train

Rumor has it, there exists a cock train-- a giant's severed cock, outfitted with train wheels and a smokestack-- that rides around during off-hours on train tracks all over the United States of America. It shoots cum at train stations as it whizzes past, drenching late travelers with hot, sticky load. It never stops for everyone. It's sentient. It's all-knowing. All-seeing. It can't be stopped.

Scientists are devising a vagina tunnel in hopes of trapping the cock train, but the cock train knows this already because the cock train is that smart and aware. The cock train will never be trapped. The cock train is forever.