Tuesday, June 9, 2009

Dogtown & Z-Boys

My name is Reginald. I'm an elderly man. I have known skateboarding ever since it was first being invented. I used to watch the very first skateboarders skate on the very first skateboards. Back then, skateboards were made the old fashioned way. The pure way.

They were made of dirt and cum. All the skateboarders would gather around and jerk off onto some dirt. Using the cum, they could mold the dirt into a skateboard shape. Then they'd bake the board at 650 degrees for 7 days, and their skateboard would be ready.

Oh how the town would smell when a skateboard was being baked. It would smell of dirt and cum everywhere you went. Dogtown was definitely the place to be, if you were a fan of dirt and cum stench.

And the skateboarders would never wear any shirts. Ever. It was frowned upon. So was circumcision. If you were circumcised, you weren't allowed to be a skateboarder. So imagine this: tanned, shirtless boys with foreskin. This was truly the golden age of skateboarding.

But then things changed. Skateboarders started wearing shirts. Jews started being allowed to skateboard. Times weren't so great anymore. In fact, they were downright bad.

I still fuck skateboarder boys anyway, though. Who could resist? They do their 720's and their 420's and their flippies on the pavement, just asking for an ass-full of cum-fuck.

Sometimes I fuck skateboarders so hard that they forget how to do their moves and have to learn them all over again. This is what I live for; it is the ultimate fuck.

In conclusion, life isn't so great anymore, but there are still pleasures to be had. Anuses remain unchanged. It's still the same hole. I have no complaints in that department.

Assistant Walmart Greeter
Fairfax, MI

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